If only I had said this or that. If only I’d done that one thing or not done the other thing. Regrets weigh heavy, as I think about where I went wrong. Guilt bearing down…suffocating me. Years of reflecting and wishing for do overs. And then…
God speaks words of comfort to me through the message of my pastor. It’s not what I say right or do right. The responsibility I’ve born for the salvation of my children cast away—leaving me with a sense of relief and deeper trust in God. A new truth that reaches to the core of my soul. It’s not my responsibility to save my children. It never has been. My job has (and continues to be) showing them Jesus.
God does the work. I have put undue pressure on myself to save my children. But that has never been God’s way. Satan stole so much joy from me as I unnecessarily carried this burden. It was never meant to be mine. It was a burden to be released into His hands. So that He could do the work of bringing them to salvation. And not only that, but continuing to work out salvation in their lives.
Mama/Dada, it’s not YOUR job to save your children. Our only responsibility is to show them Jesus—in our best moments and in our imperfections. To show our children grace, long-suffering, trust, doubt, one step forward and two steps back, forgiveness, heartache, disappointment, loyalty, restoration and redemption. The good and the bad. When we do it right and when we do it wrong. In other words, just living life.
Its two sides of the coin that our children need to see. It’s the imperfect person striving to live for Jesus. And the grace offered for those imperfections. We get too caught up in methods, “dos and don’ts,” and the next book offering “10 Steps to…” We can end up getting in the way of what God wants to do when we attempt to control or manipulate everything.
We have no ability to save our children. We can’t force them into living for Jesus. We can’t make them surrender their lives to Him. But what we can do is live for Jesus and surrender ourselves to Him every day. We can trust Him with the process of saving our children. We can rest assured that He knows the path they must take. We can cling to hope and faith. We can pray them through. And that, my friend, is the greatest freedom we can experience as a parent.